No offense to my many BDSM friends, but when you’ve seen one dungeon — you’ve seen them all. And then there’s the Black Gazza Prison.

Jenna and her sadistic medical gear.

“It’s a BDSM Sim set in a futuristic space prison ship,” said Jenna Lee. “People are either domineering guards, prisoners or sadistic medical personnel. I’m going to be Medical!”

In a flash I thumbed through my inventory and found an old Alien avatar (the tall green one with the big eyes) that I modded with a female shape, and threw on some Hawaiian shorts and a cute top. I TP’d to the sim and there were a couple Furries with sci-fi dingle-dangle things hanging on Batman utility belts, and Jenna, her sub  and a mutual friend (and Twitter Queen) Tiffany Ronzales. The Furries were apparently regulars, and were explaining the rules when I minimized Firestorm, opened another browser, searched “English to Alien” and found a page that translated for me.

“⟟ ⋏⟒⟒⎅ ⏁⍜ ☌⟒⏁ ⍜⎍⏁! ⍙⊑⟒⍀⟒ ⟟⌇ ⏁⊑⟒ ⟒⌖⟟⏁?” I hollered, and started running around the station.

“Oh, come on… we’ve got a Universal Translator!” yelled one of the Furries, I presume a guard. I kept running.

“⍙⊑⏃⏁ ⟟⎎ ⟟’⋔ ⌇⌿⟒⏃☍⟟⋏☌ ⟟⋏ ⏃ ⌰⏃⋏☌⎍⏃☌⟒ ⊬⍜⎍⍀ ⏁⍀⏃⋏⌇⌰⏃⏁⍜⍀ ⊑⏃⌇⋏’⏁ ⟒⋏☊⍜⎍⋏⏁⟒⍀⟒⎅?” I asked, and emoted that my eyes were darting around the room as I searched the station for an exit.

I continued running, and to my surprise none of the doors I encountered were locked. I saw a “WANTED” sign up on a wall — and it had an old profile pic of my avie, but not the green alien that I’d become. “Ha!” I thought to myself with satisfaction. “That will throw them off!”

And it apparently did! I continued to run around the sim, spouting alien gibberish (unless they, too, went to the clever alien translation page) and emoting panicked expressions of fear — like an alien prisoner trying to escape would, I imagined.

Then I saw it! The air lock “Surely, this will be locked,” I thought as I charged the round portal. It wasn’t. A short stretch of tube, and another portal — also unlocked — and SPACE! I shot out the airlock like a potato from a cannon!

Call Sign: Ball Breaker

Free falling for what seemed like forever ended with me crashing into a familiar planet. A beautiful sea side estate laid out before me, but my eye was drawn to the small air strip — and the fighter jet!

“Certainly, no one in their right mind would leave the keys in something as sexy hot as this fantastic jet, especially below a prison ship!” I thought as I Top Gunned my way into the cockpit and fired up the engines! Making my way into the sky I yelled “No prison can hold me!” and laughed at the wonderful time I had at the best BDSM sim I’ve ever been to!

~HEARTUN