Photo courtesy of Maggie McNeil at The Honest Courtesan

HEY HEARTUN~ I am a Gorean Kajira, a slave as is outlined in the John Norman book Dancer of Gor — in essence, being a slave is a whole way of life, involving a total modality of existence. I live according to the Slave Creed:

• He is Master and I am slave.
• He is owner and I am owned.
• He commands and I obey.
• He is to be pleased and I am to please.
• Why is this?
• Because He is Master and I am slave.
• Allow me the strength to answer questions I can’t fathom.

I believe this. I live this. But about six months ago my old Master sold me. The new Master was nice to me for a while, but lately he has been ordering me to give pleasure to some of His friends. And I never see the same ‘friend’ twice. I think they pay Him for my attention. It makes me sad. ~ RENTAL KAJIRA

DEAR RENTAL ~ I’ve got two answers for you: First the Gorean answer.

• There will be many times you are called upon to answer questions you have never thought of. To delve deep inside yourself for the answers to places you never even thought would exist. It requires a certain amount of emotional and mental strength to do this, to look in those places that may house memories you have simply forgotten, or urges you are too afraid to admit. There is much buried deep within each of us that we don’t even know is there, and at some time or another… to be completely open and honest with you Master, you will have to find these things… and bring them to the surface.

Now for the Sane answer.

• He is pimping you out. If that isn’t what you signed on for, tell him to stop or leave him. Even within the context of Gor, you deserve better. I understand that the works of John Norman spin a tale that women achieve freedom through total submission, and that in giving up agency to a master they gain absolute agency — but you are playing Second Life. The reality is, you informally contracted with another player to support each other in a fun way for both of you — and it isn’t working for you now.

~HEARTUN BREAKER

Photo courtesy of Wikipedia and Business Week Magazine.

I am new. I’ve been getting by with freebie stuff that I got from the Helping Haven Gateway — including pretty nice skins, shapes and clothing. But I’d like to really step up my game, and that takes some Linden. How do I make money in Second Life?

~Need Scratch

Dear Scratch~ 

First off, good for you to really explore the world of freebies. Helping Haven, which has been an authorized Linden Lab ‘Info Hub’ for a few years now, has a lot of free stuff and really helpful staff. (Hi, Zussa!)

But answering your question, a common one, is broad reaching and definitely not a “one size fits all” (not even Maitreya!)

Years ago, I wrote a notecard on the subject that I handed out to noobs that were pouring into the Ahern Welcome Area, back when that is where everyone landed after being solo through Welcome training. (Then came other Welcome Areas… Info Hubs… Welcome Island… a bunch of different attempts by Linden Labs to make the process of ‘onboarding’ into this world less overwhelming.)

So here it is. See if any of this works for you, and if you come up with something I’ve missed or something (gasp) NEW… please leave a comment with the info! Also, I’ve only recently returned to SL so some of these may have faded away.

~Heartun

There are several ways to make money in SL. I’ve tried to build a list without regard for ethics, good taste or prerequisite skill.

1. MAKING STUFF
Make stuff people want to buy, then sell it. Household products, sex toys, skins, clothing, weird gestures — the sky is the limit (well, you can’t make a mirror I guess.)

2. LIVING OFF THE DOLE
Tuesday is payday in SL. Live like a monk and you can be happy on $50L a week. (2020 note: this is very old info)

3. LIVING OFF THE DOLE v.2
Get several Alts and take their $50L a week for your primary account.

4. BEGGING
Its annoying, but a lot of people do it for a while. Just don’t ask me, I don’t like beggars.

5. WHORING
This is actually quite popular… and at most dance clubs is apparently an honorable profession. Visit THIS WEBSITE for some great ‘how to’ articles on the profession.

6. LAND SPECULATION
Anshe Chung doesn’t have a lock on buying land in bulk, improving it, then selling it for a bundle. You could also try opening a shopping mall.

7. SKILLED SERVICES
If you’re good at improving land you might rent yourself out. Or find something else people will pay for… like business consultation services, proof-reading bios, photography, professional friend, spy, etc.

8. PAWNSHOP/MIDDLE MAN
Buy up things on the cheap and sell them for more money than you paid. I used to do this with Dark Life weaponry and I made a mint. Now days this is called Gacha — there is even a category for it on the Second Life Marketplace.

9. BUY MONEY
Go to SLExchange and pay your real money for Linden. Nobody has to know, and at least you aren’t a whore. (Unless you’re buying Linden to get a better skin for your whore, in which case never mind!). Note: with the fluctuation of the Linden to USD exchange rate tied to the volume of ‘in world’ users, money speculators buy when the kids are busy in college… and sell when they are home on break… picking up a tidy profit. Of course, with Covid, who knows?

10. OWN POPULAR LAND
If you have a place that people go to you will get paid extra money based on how many game hours are spent in your land (called ‘dwell’ in SL-speak).

11. LUCKY BOARDS and GROUP GIFTS
Many stores, to boost traffic and gain exposure, have giveaways. Some are in-store, and some you need to be in the store group. You wait until the first initial of your name pops up. You click it and you get whatever they are giving away on that board.

12. BLACKMAIL
If you are a burly man IRL but you play a woman so that you can whore for more money you can film the encounter and copy the IM history of your John in the hopes that he is homophobic and will pay for you to not display his silliness.

13. COMMISSION
Get friends of yours to sign up to play SL under a Premium account. If they reference you during the sign-up process you get like $500L or $1000L for each friend. If you make alts and ref yourself you get the commission for that too.

Photo courtesy of Wired Magazine (click to read article on sex work during Covid)

Hey Heartun~

I’ve been with my love for a few months now. She PM’d me at a mud wrestling match that we were both at with different friends – and the attraction was simultaneously mutual and immediate. We started doing everything together, naturally, and it went beyond SL to include our Flickr and Insta feeds – and RL emails. (So RL Facebook)

I’ve got a secret, and I’m worried it could end things.

I’m an escort, and she doesn’t know. Worse, on FB she’s pretty religious, and she’s a really ‘good girl’ type (honestly) at her core. Her pure and loving nature is what is most attractive to me, but I don’t think she’d see my SL job as just that – a job. It doesn’t just fund our lovely SL life together, I pull enough real money out of SL that it actually pays some of my RL bills. I’ve been able to keep her in the dark, so far, because IRL she’s in Mexico City and I’m in Hong Kong – so I get my work done before she logs in. But “what if?”

~Working Girl

Dear Working Girl~

First off, congratulations on finding someone who you really like, and who appears to really like you. Well, the version of “you” that you’re willing to show, anyway.

In Second Life it’s completely acceptable to control which version of ourselves we allow others to see. It is a primary draw to the platform! But few of us keep SL in SL, and RL in RL in a clean manner (I mean, for any intimate relationship… how could you?) And it sounds like the intimacy of your relationship is revealing some cracks in that “work-life” barrier that you enjoy.

You aren’t alone. In a 2014 study into the personal romantic relationships of 55 women working in the indoor sex industry in Melbourne, Australia it was found that 78% reported that, overall, sex work affected their personal romantic relationships in predominantly negative ways – mostly stemming from lying, trust, guilt and jealousy. Sound familiar?

Just under half of these women were in a relationship at the time of the study, and half of those in a relationship say their partner was aware of the nature of their work. Many women reported using mental separation as a coping mechanism to manage the tensions between sex work and their personal relationships. Others say maintaining different presentations of dress and make-up, or creating a work persona, as well as sticking to the defined time of a work engagement and limiting certain feelings to work and others to home, helped them maintain emotional detachment at work. But that separation did not necessarily help their partners accept their work life.

In its conclusion the study proposed education programs aimed at addressing the negative stigma associated with the sex industry, as it may go some way towards easing the issues faced by women in their personal relationships.

I know it doesn’t look good, but this is your chosen profession in Second Life, and you’ve started to become emotionally invested in your partner. I am not the arbiter of your sexual or work choices, but I’m here to help you sort them out (maybe). Here are a couple questions you might well ask yourself:

• How ‘real’ do I want this relationship to become?
• Besides fear of losing her, why else am I holding on to this secret?
• Does making money this way fill a need or a want?
• If I want more out of this relationship, am I willing to risk losing it?

Studies and statistics can be helpful, but they don’t tell the whole story. I like them because they flesh out a discussion, not because their findings are necessarily the end-all. Follow the link, and read the whole study. A small number of these women reported positive impacts from sex work, including improved sexual self-esteem and confidence.

While maintaining open and clear communication with partners did not guarantee acceptance by the partner, I think you’ll find that all of the women who reported that sex work improved their relationships fell into that category. It may still be hard, but perhaps being open and clear is the only path to a full and fulfilling relationship. How happy do you want to be?

~Heartun

If this subject interests you, please check out this podcast by 2 Girls, 1 Podcast called “Inside Second Life’s Most Expensive Brothel“.

HEY HEARTUN ~ When I came to Second Life I looked around at a lot of jobs so I could make money so I could buy fancy clothes and a sweet little house. I started with pole dancing at a club. After a while I bought a nice enough skin and some animations and sexy clothing and I tried to be a model — but I couldn’t find anyone who wanted to pay me so I switched to being an escort.

I get clients, but most want to argue about my price — which is amongst the lowest of any of the Escorts I know. Others want me to do gross stuff like AgePlay and Furies. What do I have to do to start making some real money instead of the chump change my patrons kick out? ~ IMA BARBIGURL

DEAR IMA BARBIGURL ~ A hot skin and a bunch of sexy animations do NOT a good whore make! The sex trade in Second Life is robust and a really good whore can get a ton of Linden for getting her (sometimes his) clients hot and bothered. But you have to paint a picture. The sexy pose balls and such are just props — you gotta work hard for your money. You are selling fantasy.

First off, lets put aside this idea that you are having intercourse. You aren’t. Virtual sex is assisted masturbation, sometimes assisted mutual masturbation. Seeing their avatar boinking your avatar is nice, but its the human element behind the avatars that excites your client. You’ve got to find their fantasy first, then provide them with it. Best way to do that is to ask up front. And you really have to listen, because being an escort is all about getting repeat business… and referrals.

When your client starts telling you about their fantasy, listen carefully and ask leading questions that draw out more details. If you can do this in a quiet place with a casual setting, like a lounge or a bar, that’ll help. Even if you are chatting in instant message, paint the picture. This is also a great time to discuss your pricing terms and to get paid. Just like real life this is a cash up front kind of business. A little haggling is allowed on the clients part but if they try to beat down your price too much you haven’t sold them on your ability to satisfy their fantasy. Go back to the beginning and talk up your features and benefits.

When the preliminaries are taken care of, go to your love shack and engage your client in dialogue that acts out their fantasy. Be detailed. Tell them what you are doing to them. Tell them how what they are doing makes you feel. Be poetic and graphic all at the same time. Learn to pace things. If they busts a nut early, be kind and offer them a complimentary back-rub to enhance the value of the encounter. If they’re up for it in a reasonable amount of time, give it another go. ~ HEARTUN BREAKER